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“The Point System” is quite simple really. Do something kick-ass, you earn them. Suck at life, you lose them. Plus or minus, just like golf! See, always bringing it back to sports. Now, I recently had a conversation with my friend Laura about the length of time a new man on the scene is on the point system. Our conclusion; forever.

I really don’t know where this all started. It makes me think of “Leave it to Beaver”. No particular episode, but I feel as though Eddie Haskell would have racked up brownie points only to keep him in the plus when he lost them, lost a lot of them. The whole idea is to keep your head afloat, or better yet, stop doing moronic things. Girls can be on point systems, sure, why not, but bottom line, men stay on them – for life.

About a month ago, Laura started dating a new boy. Romance, bliss, she’s a happy little camper who constantly has a smile on her face like she’s had cupcakes delivered every morning. I wonder if she does? Hmm… I digress. The other day her boyfriend did a lovely thing, and she said, “you get a point for that.” All of a sudden a look of confusion fell upon his face. “Point? Aren’t we over points?” And here lies the problem. No sir, no you are not.

Brownie Points are for life. This is how we women can tell if we should accept your proposal, marry you, or better yet, divorce you! When women discuss their boyfriends and try to outshine the other with flowers, candy and nights in watching rom-com’s, they are discussing your points. When women trash their pathetic excuses for SO’s, they are discussing your points. The system is a benchmark for awesome people, and sorry to say, it’s not going away.

So buck up, champ! You go after those points (football bum tap). Because Lord only knows, you’ll be accumulating some negative ones before you know it.

Point, Kelly!