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This is an excerpt from a larger body of writing I am working on. It is pure fiction, and any resemblance to a real place or person is only a coincidence.

Here is what I know.

Fact of the matter is, over wine, always wine, the most genius thoughts are not only conjured up, but developed. A bottle of wine, infinite possibilities.

Leigh and I were chatting about dating in the concrete jungle, bleh.

Smile, smile, back – or was that smile directed at the girl to the left of me? He stands up, whisky clasped in firm hand. Step, step, step. Lands. Girl on my left, come on down. Well, at least she won’t be ordering her next glass of bubbles. Some girls have all the luck, and a Prada purse.

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Back to the wine. Genius idea. Working in this day and age has me tied to my phone. When asked if I am with child on a bloated day, I almost say yes – my precious iPhone. If I was going to make a real go of this love game, why not combine my child, and my need for meeting someone new. A love child.

“You should really download it.” Leigh said, while flicking through pictures, aimlessly yet with purpose, on her phone.

Download the app that eliminates the miscommunication. If I smile, and he smiles – we talk. No confusion, no coy glances hoping that someone musters up the courage to leave their safety blanket of friends and colleagues. Skip the drinks and smiles; you need a little black dress to turn heads anyway. Instead, sit back and let the magic happen; with an app on your phone and quite possibly your old college sweatpants and a pint of ice cream. Genius.

“It’s a game, it’s non-committal, and I can guarantee you most of the guys will make you want to vomit. But, hey, some won’t. Maybe some handsome guy will like you and you’ll like him right back! Might happen!”

What a sales pitch, Leigh. Luckily for her, and I guess myself, I was on board at, “handsome”.

After all, it couldn’t hurt. As I looked around the restaurant, the walls the colour of a real egg with grandiose wooden beams and fixtures, I knew that if I wanted to stand out in the crowd, I needed to make the crowd smaller. What would stand out on the manila walls? Colour, easy. Artwork, easier. Someone webbed onto it, tilted sideways as if they were at war with Spiderman’s web? I’d notice that.

If I could get the smiler to smile, I could navigate the dating world a tad more effectively.

Apps, search, install. If I didn’t give it a whirl, I would never succeed. Success or cat lady? Always choose the possibility of success.

“Another bottle please!”

Our waitress looked like she needed a good lay, too.

“Lord knows I’ll be needing it.”

Leigh grinned and took her last sip.

A little bit more of what I am working on…

Pic found here.

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